Brief Summary:
The authors of the book, Yes! 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive, believe that persuasion is not an art, but a science. That is, by learning and implementing the simple strategies provided, anyone can see big differences in their persuasive powers. The challenge of persuading others to do what we want is not always easy and it is a challenge that we face every day. The big question is “what makes people say yes to our requests?” The book, Yes! 50 scientifically proven ways to be persuasive, offers straightforward persuasion tactics that anyone can apply to become a better and more effective persuader, whether you are a college student or the owner of a corporation. The book is filled with explanations of conducted research to depict just how reliable the strategies are, as well as many everyday examples of how the strategies can be carried out in the work place or in a social setting. While reading this book you are literally offered 50 scientifically proven ways to be persuasive in 50 short chapters; interestingly, it also provides strategies to avoid the common pitfalls of persuasion that we typically fall victim too. In total, the book, Yes! 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive, presents brilliant ways to make small changes to your persuasion techniques that will allow you to improve your persuasion power and make people to say “Yes!”
Why I Chose this Book:
I chose this book because I felt as though I would greatly benefit from reading it at this point in my life. As a junior here at SU, I will soon have to be doing a lot of persuading. Whether it be persuading others that I am a good candidate to hold an leadership position in organizations I am apart of or persuading graduate school programs that I am worthy of the education they have to offer, having good persuasion strategies will be very important in the near future. Now that I have read this book, I am happy with the decision I made to read it. Not only did I learn 50 great ways to better persuade others, I also got to read about a lot of interesting research and learn really cool facts I didn’t expect to get out of this book (for example: did you know the first thing ever sold on eBay was a broken laser pointer that was bought for $14!)
Recommendation:
Because of the knowledge I was able to obtain from reading the book, I would definitely recommend it to others. Although I was a little overwhelmed when thinking about how I would remember or even get through 50 strategies and chapters, each of the 50 proven ways to be persuasive provided were simple and straightforward. First and foremost I would recommend this book to business workers or owners. Despite the fact that there were several examples of how to persuade your friends and family, many of the ways to persuade others would work best in a professional or work setting. That being said, I would also recommend it to others, students specifically, because one day we will all be business people. Knowing these strategies to enhance our persuasion power is knowledge that is priceless. Although we may have much experience with persuasion or learned about it in classes like Social Psychology, this book provides a more in-depth look into the science of persuasion. It provides detailed insight to studies that have explored persuasion and persuasion techniques that you couldn’t get from any textbook.
Relevance:
Reciprocity, although unstated, is a norm of social behavior in which we treat others how we have been treated (Gouldner, 1960). When we receive favors, gifts, or nice gestures we will sometimes go to extreme measures to return what we have been given. Many of the strategies presented in the book involved the norm of reciprocity (Gouldner, 1960). As mentioned in the book, reciprocity leads to a strong foundation of relationships and a strong foundation to persuasion. This is relevant to me because like all social beings, I constantly reciprocate the favors that have been done for me. Although I would not want to use this concept in an unethical way, I now understand the ways in which I can use reciprocity to my advantage and to improve my persuasive power.
The theory of Cognitive Dissonance explains how holding attitudes that are inconsistent with our behaviors causes psychological arousal/tension that is unwanted therefore we become motivated to reduce these feelings of discomfort and change either our attitudes or behaviors to be more consistent with each other (Festinger, 1957). Cognitive dissonance can increase your power of persuasion. Imagine someone who you do not like very much. Now imagine that person asking you to do you to do a favor for them. If you did multiple favors for them your behavior would not match the attitudes you hold towards them and your attitudes would begin to change; you would begin see that person more favorably. The situation explained above is one that is similar to an example and strategy presented in the book. This is relevant to me because not only do I now know the benefits of asking for a favor, I will be more likely to get what I want by better understanding the relationship between cognitive dissonance and persuasion.
Although some may try to resist social influences, conformity is similar to a reflex (Milgram, 1969). There are many influences that help to explain our everyday actions. As social beings the majority of our influences come from other people whether we know it or not. This can be shown through laugh tracks on television (Fein, Goethals, & Kurgler, 2007) as well as unconscious imitations of someone (Chartrand & Bargh, 1999). Many of the strategies in the book explain how to use social proof to your advantage when trying to persuade others. This is relevant to me because I now know that when trying to persuade someone, making them believe that “everyone is doing it” really can make a difference.
Likability is very important when it comes to persuasion. Most of the time likability comes through similarity. An example of this can be seen through research examining social mimicry (Bailenson & Yee, 2005); the more similar you act to someone’s behavior the more they come to like you. Many strategies in the book depicted how similarity leads to likability, which then leads to more successful persuasion. This is relevant to me because I can now understand the importance of relating to my audience and being liked. Although it can be hard to remember at times, being a close-minded bitch does not benefit you very much; especially, when it comes to persuasion.
It is common knowledge that we want something most when we can’t have it; or when it is scarce; this concept is similar to theory of Psychological Reactance (Brehm & Brehm 1981). This theory suggests that people react against threats to their beliefs by perceiving their threatened beliefs as more attractive (Brehm & Brehm, 1981). Scarcity has great influence of persuasion. If you are trying to persuade someone to buy one of your products this is a great tactic to use and is also one of the 50 persuasive strategies given in the book. This is relevant to me because as a college student that is part of many organizations I am fundraising all the time. The next time that I am selling shirts at the concourse tables I will make sure to let others know that they should get one before their size runs out! Although, this may seem silly my persuasive power will be increased due to the idea of scarcity, an idea that so many of us dislike.
Author:
After many years of falling victim to the pitfalls of persuasion, Dr. Robert Cialdini decided to go undercover at thousands of jobs researching the science and influence of persuasion. In the field of persuasion, Dr. Cialdini is one the most cited social psychologist; therefore it is only right to call him an expert. Not only is he a co-author for this book, Yes! 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive, he is also the author of the book, Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion. Because Yes! 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive has such highly known authors and each of the 50 strategies the book provides is backed by extensive research, the book is very credible as well as very scholarly. After reading the book it is clear that it is based solely on scientific research and data rather than personal judgments.
Strengths:
“When can a bonus become and onus?” “Do favors behave like bread or wine?” “When is your name your game?” Throughout the book, questions like these were asked to explain each of the 50 proven ways to be persuasive; this is the thing that I enjoyed most about the book. The way in which these questions were asked made me want to keep reading! Another strength that the book has is the ways in which the questions presented are answered. Each chapter begins with a real-life example of how these questions may come about in our everyday lives. Following this, multiple scientific experiments that implemented and explored the influences of persuasion are explained to answer the questions. Importantly, each answer pertains to one of the 50 ways to be persuasive. After the questions were answered and further explained, examples of how the specific strategies could be used to benefit people in the office, in social settings, or in the home were given; I found this to be another strength of the book. The neat thing about this book is that as I finished reading it I was able to realize the usefulness of all the 50 strategies. Although it may not be all at once, I will eventually need and use them all. Because of this, I can honestly say that I can see myself looking through this book in the future or perhaps rereading it for personal benefit. I believe that anyone, even those different from myself, can read this book and not only learn simple and straight forward ways to increase their persuasive power but also many things about research and other random facts about the real world.
Weaknesses:
There are few shortcoming of the book; there was extensive research to support each of the 50 persuasive strategies and dozens of fun facts that kept it interesting. One thing that I believe could improve the book is broadening the audience to whom the book is directed to. Although I gained plenty of important knowledge from this book, I feel as though it was geared more towards older people. Many of the examples mentioned throughout the book explained how people could better persuade their coworkers or their children. As a college student I feel that the authors could have included examples that relate more to young adults like how to better persuade those who read graduate school applications. As I explained earlier, I chose this book because it is a crucial time in my life to learn about persuasion. That being said, there is potential improvement in targeting a broader scope of people.
Point/Message:
If I had to narrow it down to one thing, I believe that the “take home” point of this book is that small changes in your persuasion strategies can make a huge difference in your overall persuasive power. Whether it is changing the wording of your request to include the word “because” or coming up with a name that rhythms to make your next big project sound more appealing, with a small amount of effort you will hear the word “Yes!” more than ever before.
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Bailenson, J. N. & Yee, N. (2005). Digital Chameleons: Automatic assimilation of nonverbal gestures in immersive virtual environments. Psychological Science, 16, 215-222.
Brehm, S. S., & Brehm, J. W. (1981). Psychological reactance: A theory of freedom and control. New York: Academic Press.
Chartrand, T. L., & Bargh, J. A. (1999). The chameleon effect: The perception-behavior link and social interaction. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 76, 893-910.
Fein, S., Goethals, G. R., & Kugler, M. B. (2007). Social influence on political judgments: The case of presidential debates. Political Psychology, 28, 165-192.
Festinger, L. (1957). A theory of cognitive dissonance. Stanford, CA: Stanford University Press.
Goldstein, N. J, Martin, S. J., & Cialdini, R. B. (2008).Yes! 50 scientifically proven ways to be more persuasive. New York: Free Press.
Gouldner, A. W. (1960). The norm of reciprocity: A preliminary statement. American Sociological Review, 25, 161-178.
Milgram, S., & Toch, H. (1969) Collective behavior: Crowds and social movements. In G. Lindzey & E. Aronson (Eds.), The handbook of social psychology (2nd ed., Vol 4, pp. 507-610). Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley.
